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My Dominance is not Jiu Jitsu and my dynamic won't be a bouncy castle

Συζήτηση στο φόρουμ 'Νέοι στον χώρο του BDSM' που ξεκίνησε από το μέλος íɑʍ_Monkeץ, στις 3 Αυγούστου 2017.

  1. íɑʍ_Monkeץ

    íɑʍ_Monkeץ Contributor

    Βρήκα αυτό το note τυχαία στο ( φετ ) και σκέφτηκα να το μεταφέρω εδώ:

    [ https://***.com/users/2855446/posts/4552725 ]

    This is heteronormative because I'm talking about myself. Deal with it.
    You hear it more and more from coy young subs out there...

    SweetLittleMeowMeowKittenBabyXO42069: "What are you gonna do if I say no?" (Insert childish, shit-eating grin)
    Monk: "Pay for my almond milk chai latte and go home."


    -The presumption of course being that D/s relationships start out as mental Jiu Jitsu matches where it's the Dom's responsibility to win some emotional chess game and submit the resisting sub; and if that's the way you wanna start your dynamic that's up to you but I'm not trying to "tame" anyone, I'm not trying to pull the sword out of the stone and I'm not trying to solve a rubik's cube.

    What I want is a dance partner

    I lead, she follows. To find out if we have the same rhythm, the same energy, the same taste and I don't see how starting with someone who wants me to "earn" their submission through some undefined intellectual obstacle course says anything about how well we'd fare together. You wanna start off slow and get to know me so you're confident you won't end up a lampshade? Great. You wanna negotiate the terms of our agreement and not leave things open-ended before we start our relationship? Wonderful. But if you wanna throw me curveballs and have me jump through hoops so you can rate my performance then I'm sorry but I'm just not gonna play along.

    -As for when we do establish a dynamic I see quite a few relationships that are based on a perpetual duality of disobedient one meets the disciplanarian. Dom creates rules and protocols and sub constantly tests her boundaries to be play punished and pushed back within the set parameters. Like a bouncy castle. And hey I'm not kink-shaming a lot of people have that and it works for them but once again, not me.

    I want a dance partner

    We constantly build and hone our skills and branch out into other styles and evolve into better and better and better partners. Which means it'll always be more strict and complicated and we'll always be ramping up our expectations. In other words TPE. That's just me though.

    -Monk
     
  2. Maverick

    Maverick Good guy to a fault.